As we lean into the experience of the moment—releasing our stories and gently holding our pain or desire—Radical Acceptance begins to unfold.
The two parts of genuine acceptance—seeing clearly and holding our experience with compassion—are as interdependent as the two wings of a great bird. Together, they enable us to fly and be free.
~ Tara Brach, “Radical Acceptance: Embracing your Life wtih the Heart of a Buddha”
The boundary to what we can accept is the boundary to our freedom.*
~ From “Radical Acceptance” by Tara Brach
* To understand this somewhat bold assertation, we must understand the true meaning of acceptance (hopefully my words below and our discussion will help reveal this).
Dear Wise Women,
Three weeks ago, I posed the question “ Could it all simply come down to Self-Compassion?” And since then we have been unpacking or, perhaps more accurately, unravelling, this surprisingly complicated question.
Last week we looked at how self-comparison not only prevents us from being compassionate to ourselves, but actually steals our joy. This week, I would like to expand on this by exploring what Tara Brach calls “the trance of unworthiness” and how the only way to liberate it is through “radical acceptance”.
We are going to watch the first three minutes of the following video together (please feel free to watch it in its entirety on your own time)…but before we do, let me share the following key points about what acceptance isn’t (as this is sometimes the best way to learn what something is):
Acceptance is NOT about:
- giving up
- giving in
- becoming passive
- inaction
- liking, wanting, choosing, or supporting whatever it is that you are accepting
Rather, “acceptance is the willingness to experience ourselves and our lives as it is.”
Last week we noticed the gripping power of three “C” words: Comparison, Conformity and Competition, this week let us feel the freedom in the “A” words: Awareness, Acceptance and Allowing.
I look forward to growing with you,
Love Patti
“When we say, “I accept myself as I am,” we are not accepting a story about a good or bad self. Rather, we are accepting the immediate mental and sensory experiences we interpret as self. We are seeing the familiar wants and fears, the judging and planning thoughts as a part of the flow of life. Accepting them in this way actually enables us to recognize that experience is impersonal and frees us from the trap of identifying ourselves as a deficient and limited self.”
~ Tara Brach