“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”
- Anais Nin
Dear Wise Women,
Seven weeks ago we met in the field and set off on a path. No road map. No plan. No destination. Just a profound willingness to expand in the direction of love.
And, oh my goodness, can you believe what has transpired since then?
Oh wise women, I truly believe something magical happened back in that field. I believe that our openness, our curiosity, our innocence, our wonder, our willingness to meet one another so fully initiated some sort of alchemical reaction. I believe that we touched, and were touched by, the same magical energy that turns a caterpillar into a butterfly and coaxes a rose out of its bud. Unbeknownst to us, we received this magic… our hearts united and we agreed to open.
And in doing so, we unlocked an ancient memory. A memory of a time when our hearts only knew about pure love. A time when our hearts were unlocked and unguarded.
Whether for a fleeting second or a for a day, we remembered, and we felt the sensation of an infinitely expansive heart.
And then, as we must, we returned to the path. The human path. Where expansive hearts do not feel safe. And we (innocently) contracted.
But something is different this time - the contractions feel familiar but the path feels different. Its like we are walking the same labyrinth but it is much bigger than the last time we walked it. There is a spaciousness and an awareness around the contraction. It still hurts, we still feel frightened…but there is something else going on - there is a source of ease beneath the contraction, a river reminding us to stay open and keep flowing.
And it helps that we are not alone.
Hand in hand, we ride the waves. We support each other on our relentless quest to un-condition love and to un-earth our innocence. Piece by piece, rock by rock we notice the fortress walls relaxing… the jewel is slowly being revealed.
And eventually we come face to face with the loyal defenders of the fortress around our hearts. We come to realize that these vigilant guards, though they served us at some point, are no longer needed. We see how they are preventing us from receiving the love we want to receive, and giving the love we want to give.
And buoyed by this river, we say yes. We say YES to our deep, deep longing to experience unguarded love.
“Unguarded Love”, This title came through me as full body experience this week. Swimming in the wake of all that had been revealed over the past three weeks, it became painfully clear how much easier it is to be in the field of love with you women than with my partner, my children, my mother. I noticed my tendency to blame them for this “disconnect”. I noticed the tightness in my chest, an all to familiar feeling in our relationships. My mind almost tricked me into spiraling down the familiar loop of blame and resentment. But my heart wouldn’t allow it this time.
My heart said its time to let go of your remaining defenses.
Its time to trust that Love knows how to protect itself.
And so, bravely, slowly, and and very, very gently I am embarking on a new way of loving…
❤❤❤❤❤
No longer afraid of what they will say,
I speak the way love wants to speak.
No longer afraid of what they won’t say,
I speak the way love wants to speak.
No longer afraid of how they’ll react,
I act the way love wants to act.
No longer afraid of how they’ll feel
I touch the way love wants to touch.
One step at a time,
one word at a time,
one gesture at a time,
I explore this new way of walking in the field
unguarded.
❤❤❤❤❤
Wise women, will you embark on this new way with me?
With endless love,
Patti
And now a little “outside” wisdom and guidance…
“We may once have had very good reasons to guard our hearts; we had to protect ourselves from further hurt. But from the seat of awareness, there is not one good reason to continue doing so. We are not born this way. We had to learn to shut down, and by the good grace of life, we can unlearn it. We can learn to open back up to the force of love and joy that resides within us in every moment of every day.”
If you want to live a heart-minded life, the decision is yours, dear one. It begins by making the choice to take just one small step toward yourself, instead of away. Start gently blowing on the wounded and scared parts of yourself as if they were hot coals. Stoke them with encouraging words. Cocoon them in love. Genuinely care for them. They need to be coaxed into coming out from protection and they need a life raft to hold on to when traversing through the rough and choppy waters of the darkness. Most importantly, you need tender, gentle, and constant encouragement to strengthen your resolve in keeping your heart open, especially when your finely tuned instincts to protect are activated.
We must decide to excavate, to search for the tender parts of us we have abandoned and hidden away. We must look to welcome home the split-off and orphaned parts. This retrieval of the forsaken is where profound and beautiful soul making begins. Our hearts house the essence of life and source. They are the well of divinity within us, which when aligned with, awakened, and re-connected to, will eradicate and heal, forgive and dispel, and reconcile and release each hurtful relationship and memory. Our hearts are the source of our inspiration to spread and stir love and goodness throughout the world. I would go so far as to say that if each of us were to choose to live in alignment with our hearts, the world would have no choice but to find peace. The earth would thrive. How could it not?”
- Sarah Blondin, “Heart Minded, How to hold yourself and others in love”
Letting The Guards Go
If it were up to my mind, I wouldn’t do it.
But, for the first time in my life, my heart is louder than my mind.
I can hear it beating,
pounding,
pushing its way out of the fortress and past the guards.
I say yes to my heart
Its ok
We’re ok.
And in hearing this permission, something changes within my heart
it slows down, it stops pushing
and starts dancing with each guard
with a slight bow, a little curtsy
my heart thanks each and every guard for their devoted service
and asks them,
“What has your post been for the past 50 years, what have you been protecting me from”?
And one by one, they proudly respond:
Hurt
Rejection
Abandonment
Despair
Oh, my heart says, I guess you didn’t know…
you never really kept those things away from me
I felt them knocking the whole time
and when you fought against them, my fear of them grew stronger
and so did my belief that I needed you.
Thank-you dear guards for your devoted service
your work is done now,
I’m ready for Love to be its own protector.
- Patti Wardlaw