Learning Outcome: Do an environmental scan of your last year, giving you invaluable clues for where you are now and what’s next.
NOTE: Some of these prompts may seem a bit repetitive. My intention is to word things slightly differently and come from a different angle, which may inspire added layers of clarity for you.
Remember to write from your stream of consciousness and navigate these prompts from your and gut. If your fears come up, name them and write them too, and check in with yourself to come back to your grounding and truth.
You cannot go wrong with this. We are simply capturing a slice of time in your life. So, have fun and be light with this. Let it be an ADVENTURE!
I suggest setting a timer for 2 minutes for each prompt, write your stream of consciousness and move onto the next prompt. You can also go back and add more thoughts later.
Step 1: Look back over the last year
Over the last year, BOTH personally and professionally…
Some of my accomplishments, results, breakthroughs and successes were…
- My ability to be vulnerable and ask for help during my cancer treatment
- My connection to source and ability to get downloads and visions from angels
- Stepping into a more clear vision of what I want for my classes and executing it when I went back in April (women only, registered only)
- My connection with Michelle Crawford, yoga teacher, and her offering me her studio for one weekly class
- Making numerous new and positive connections with like minded women
- Receiving a blessing from my friends and students prior to my surgery, being showered with love and accepting it
- Feeling a deep connection to my husband during our counselling intensive in Victoria and during our recoveries (we both had surgery in the last six months)
The best things in my life and work over the last year were… I am most grateful for…
- My friends and relationships with my students. The open hearted and deep connections that I have fostered.
- Seeing my children grow and explore aspects of themselves that many kids their age are afraid to look at
- Successful enrolment of my classes for my April – June offerings
- Receiving such validating feedback from my students and my spiritual teachers
- Having such a beautiful post surgery/healing experience
- Offering and creating a beautiful blessing ceremony for my friends, Cathy and Kirk
- The feedback I received from the young girls who attended Chickadee camps and the boys in my kids class
I am proud of myself for…
- Starting Practicing Grace Qigong
- Sharing openly about my cancer journey
- Asking for help (meals)
- Asking my friends to come and participate in a blessing ceremony for me and my family
- Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries with my family of origin (especially my mom and dad)
- Going to marriage counselling with Dave
- Co-hosting Chickadees Camps
- Standing up for myself regarding business arrangements
What I learned about myself was…
- I am stronger than I think
- I am valued by others
- I am perceived positively by others
- I am able to channel/download spiritual teachings
- People feel closer to me when I am vulnerable and real
- I seem to get things done when I am under pressure
- I am not very efficient with my time
- I procrastinate
- I am very good with young children (teaching them)
- I am creative and spontaneous when I need to be (ie. when teaching a class to kids)
I felt the most lit up and fulfilled when…
- I am teaching classes
- I am with like minded friends
- I am in nature
- I attended Satsang retreats
- I am having a deep conversation with a friend and am able to help them
I felt the most free and alive– and most like myself when…
- I was teaching classes
- I was camping hiking in Vancouver Island
- I was recovering from my surgery (this was a profoundly deep spiritual experience)
My favourite things to do were…
- Camp and hike on Van Island
- Teach classes
- Work with young kids (though I never looked forward to it, I always enjoyed it)
- Write (emails to friends during my cancer, emails to my students about content covered in class
- Skinny dip in the ocean
What gave me the most energy was… I got the most joy from…
- Chickadees camps (during but not before or after)
- My classes (during but not before or after)
- Camping with my family
- Swimming naked in the ocean with my best friend
I surprised myself when…
- I chose to have a double mastectomy and reconstruction
- I committed to this program and the one with an intuitive counselor
I felt in alignment and totally in the flow when…
- I was recovering from my surgery and I woke up at 5:00 am every day and followed a beautiful routine of meditation, journaling, reading, qigong and yoga. Later on I went outside for a long walk, ate exceptionally well and had a nap.
- At almost every single class (DURING class only)
My biggest“blessons” (blessings + lessons) in the last year were…
- My breast cancer, dealing with the fear, dealing with the sense of failure and shame
- Challenges in my marriage
- My daughter breaking up with her boyfriend (who I was incredibly close to)
- Creating boundaries with my mom, and recognizing the energetic drain that she has been to me
- Hearing negative (second hand) feedback from a well known qigong teacher regarding my cancer “that perhaps it was because my practice wasn’t very deep”. This was very upsetting to me and a big lesson about control and ego (hers).
Some of the biggest obstacles, challenges and roadblocks, however big or small, were…
- My husband’s hip surgery and the timing of it (6 days after my diagnosis)
- Continued disconnection between me and my husband
- The setback to my physical well being (from my surgery)
The hardest or worst thingsthat happened in my life and work over the last year were…
- Breast cancer
- Not feeling honoured for my work at Chickadees
- Uncertainty and lack of clarity regarding my business arrangement for renting studio space
What I liked the least over last year was…
- Worrying about class enrolment
- Working very hard for very little money
- Feeling let down when life returned back to normal after my recovery. There was so much hope for change during my recovery and then it seemed to dwindle and both Dave and I returned to some of our old patterns. I feel like I am actually doing worse than before the surgery, despite all the lessons and growth that occurred.
I felt the most frustrated, stressed and drainedwhen…
- I find myself dealing with the same issues that I have been working on for the past 15 years
- I think about all the unfinished projects and tasks in my life
- Dealing with my dad on business matters
- I interact with my mom
- I map out my day and have it unfold nothing like I visioned
- We spent more money than we make in a month, fail to add to our savings
I felt suffocated and chained when…
- Things continue to stay the same in my marriage, especially after building up so much hope after our counselling weekend
- I think about all the things I need to do, all the unfinished projects in my life
- I realize I depend on my husband for financial support, and depend on him going to a job he doesn’t like!
- Everyone else’s needs and demands came before mine
- I cannot communicate my feelings with my husband
My least favourite things to do were…
- House work
I felt least like myself when…
- Since April, since recovering from my surgery, I have been trying to reintegrate and it isn’t working. I just realized as I write this that I am really out of sync with “who I am”.
I focused too much on…
- social media
- tidying the house
I felt the most distracted by…
- social media
- other people’s demands on me
What I know for sure about the last year, more than ever before is…
- I have been propelled into making changes! It was a very difficult year and there is an absolute urgency to change.
My last year can be summed up as…
A year in which truth was revealed and a year that broke me open. There were many difficult times and many magical moments. The last year was all about chaos and turmoil followed by blessings, transformation and now a difficult re-integration.
A year that has forced me to step into my power and to step into following and living my passions!
Step 2: Reflect on where you are now
I am most excited about…
The possibilities of breaking through old patterns and living my life on purpose and with passion!
5 things I am most grateful for right now are…
The opportunity to work with you!
The opportunity to work with Jill
My husband’ support
3 opportunities in my life and work I want to take advantage of are…
The opportunity to develop my gift of intuition/channeling
The opportunity to invest in my business
The opportunity to deepen and improve my marriage
I am happiestand most inspired when…
I dream about possibilities
I believe in myself
I sense the awakening of the collective consciousness
What lights me up, makes me come aliveand gives me the most joy…
Seeing someone in my class have an ah-ah moment
Receiving messages from spirit
When I feel most myself, I am…
Deeply present and connected to divine source
I know I’m respected for…
My communication skills, my open heartedness, my humility and honesty.
What I’m loving the most is…
The fact that I’m believing change is possible
I love making a difference in….
People’s lives! It gives me tremendous pleasure when my students tell me how valuable my classes are to them and how much I am helping them.
My kids lives, especially when I can teach them ways of coping and managing stress and anxiety.
I wish I could…
Transform this block that is preventing me from living my life the way I want to.
Remove the discrepancy between how I feel when I teach and how I feel the rest of the time.
Stop worrying that people don’t like my classes, and that I am not offering enough, do not know enough.
Work individually with people and help them make transformative and meaningful transformations in their lives.
If I wasn’t afraid, I would…
Further my training, figure out what path is the best and go for it!
Dive into an opportunity to become a counselor
I’m focusing too much on…
The reasons why I can’t create a successful practice: the costs, the work, and the fear that even if I get the training and/or build a business plan, that I won’t be able to do the job once I get there!
I am tired of…
Not believing in myself. Of finishing each day with an unsatisfied feeling.
I am feeling super challenged by…
I am getting distracted by…
My lack of focus (I’m all over the place with a little bit of focus on a lot of things, but no real focus on any one thing)! I am distracted by unfinished projects and tasks and ongoing daily housework/child care.
Where I’m compromising on myself is…
I feel like being a mother is a giant and necessary compromise. I also feel that I am compromising with my family and my role in the family business, but that it is also necessary. I would like to reframe my perception of both of these roles so that I don’t feel compromised!
I want to do more of…
Spend time in nature
Having fun with my husband and family
Things that light me up (I’d like to find activities/hobbies that bring me pleasure…very few seem to)
Managing our finances with an attitude of abundance and inspiration
I want to do less of…
Mindless puttering around the house
Overspending/letting our budget lapse
I want help with…
Changing destructive habits
Creating a business plan
Executing a business plan
The biggest things in my way are…
My lack of motivation
My lack of focus
My perceived shortage of time and resources
My feelings of loneliness
The 3 things I know need to fix and/or figure out are…
How to connect to my intrinsic passions and motivation
How to stop procrastinating
Understand and address my loneliness
I am most ready for…
A radical change to how I face and live out each day
I wish I would…
Stop putting off getting what I want, and stop assuming that I don’t know how to do what I need to do.
My deepest desires are…
To have a deeply intimate and inspiring relationship with my partner and to wake up each day feeling grateful and enthusiastic.
My biggest fears are…
That nothing will ever change. That I will live the rest of my life with these feelings.
What I want more than anything is…
To live on purpose and with passion.
Deep down, I know I need to…
Show up in a whole new way in my marriage/change
how I am in our relationship (or leave the marriage).
The unfinished business that’s frustrating me and holding me back is…
My lack of worthiness to pursue my own passions and interests. My tendency to give up on anything that is hard.
The decision that would be a game changer for me is…
To pursue a path that is difficult
If I could wave a magic wandand give myself a big confidence boost, I would say to myself…
You will have a meaningful, rewarding and financially lucrative career, deeply intimate relationships, inner harmony and intrinsic motivation to care for you self and others.
I wish someone would finally tell me how…
To bring my true self into my relationships.
I need to CLAIM and say YES to…
LOVE and JOY
I need to LET GO of…
FEAR and RESENTMENT
I know it is finally time to…
I’m learning how to…
The partners and allies I treasure are…
My friends I can turn to (Jackie, Cathy, Katrina, Ariel, Francis)
My teachers (Pamela, Michelle, Patti M)
My coaches/counselors (Nadine, Jill)
My biggest strengths are…
My willingness to see and speak the truth, my listening and intuitive skills, my interpersonal skills.
My biggest opportunities are…
I have the chance to wipe my slate clean and write what I want on it (to some degree), this is a huge opportunity (even though it feels terrifying).
To integrate all that I have learned (I have done A LOT of spiritual work and clearing) into my practical life.
I know deep down that…
I am here to teach and heal, starting with myself. I also know that I am obstructing the pathway to a deeper relationship with my husband and even my kids. I am blocked off around him (and to a lesser degree with my kids).
I am most ready for…
Living a life of purpose and passion and connection with my loved ones.
My biggest priorities are to…
Face my fears and address the issues that are holding me back (How to connect to my intrinsic passions and motivation, How to stop procrastinating, Understand and address my loneliness)
What I know for sure about myself more than ever before is…
I am lonely and I am afraid and I am ready to face it.
What I most want to remember about WHERE I AM NOW is…
This nauseating feeling in my stomach because I know change is coming and I am afraid I won’t be able to do it in a positive way and I’m afraid of losing stability and security.
What I want to celebrate about myself so far in this program…